Are You a Champion of The Family?

The family.

It is on my mind constantly. The family. What is a family? Why are families important? What do families need? What is harming families? What is distracting families?

For me, family life is the air I breathe. It is what I live for, and love for, and even fight for. It is where my Faith is lived out and nurtured. It is the resting place of my marriage, it is the resting place of my children, and beyond my home, it is the most fundamental and most important unit of every society.

In our culture, in our churches, in our stadiums, in our schools, in our legal system, and in just about everything, families are not truly cherished, nurtured, encouraged, loved, and safeguarded. Families have become a means to an end. Utilitarian. Disposable. Stretched thin. Worn out. Distracted. Tired. Discouraged. Beat down. Beat up. Broken. Our culture uses families; it is not at the service of families.

I was on a retreat once and the priest gave a reflection on how important it is to be careful about what you allow into the doorway of your soul. I have never forgotten that on a personal level, but over the years it has hit me that as a wife and mother, along with my husband, we have to be diligent about what we allow into the soul of our family, because if we are not careful, our family can easily become consumed by everything around us, become a battleground for the social and cultural wars, and we can ultimately lose our identity as a family and unravel very quickly.

The same goes for every family, but also for every culture and society. We must be careful what we allow into the door of our culture because it will directly or indirectly impact every single person in that culture, at present and in the future. We must be careful what we let into the doors of our souls, our families, and our societies.

Safeguarding the family should be everyone’s priority, everywhere, in everything, and in every circumstance. Why? Because when we safeguard the family, we protect the ability to help bring good into the world, we counteract evil, we protect God’s way of working in the world, we protect lives, professions, and vocations…all of it hinges on the family. All of it. It all boils down to the family.

If you are not convinced of why the family matters so much and why it must be protected, think for a moment of how God Himself could have entered the world in any other way, but He chose to come into the world as a tiny Baby, by way of a family. Humble, quiet, unnoticed, vulnerable. And yet, powerful, profound, and world-changing! Does this not tell us something about the importance of the family? Does this not tell us something about the importance and impact of one. single. life?

This November, in my State of Missouri, in addition to the Presidential election, we will vote on Amendment 3. It is one of the most vile attacks on the family. It touches the family on every level. If passed:

1. It will impact the safety, health, and well-being of women.

Make no mistake about it, women are targets in the physical world and in the spiritual realm because it is through our wombs that children enter the world. Satan hates your womb, Ladies, and he hates the babies you bring into this world. He wants to make the womb of every woman, now and in the future, a battleground. Tell him “no”. Tell him to get as far away from your womb as possible and from the wombs of all women everywhere. And pray for the protection of every woman, everywhere, to have the wisdom, courage, and support she needs to maintain the safety and dignity of her womb, especially when she is facing a very difficult circumstance.

2. It Will Legalize Abortion, which is the killing of unborn children.

The ability for a Baby to safely come into this world and to have a chance to live because they are a human being just like us should be the rule. It should not be the exception. Abortion is the killing of an innocent child.

Listen, I know the arguments. What if a woman is raped? What if the circumstances are not ideal? What if the resources are not available? What if a woman is afraid? What if she just does not want to have a Baby? These, and others, are all legitimate questions and concerns. But I sit here writing with a profound understanding of what it means to experience abuse, what it means to be afraid, what it means to be worried about less than ideal circumstances, hearing heart-wrenching stories of friends who have been raped, hearing stories of women who have endured grueling pregnancies, hearing about the physical and emotional toll it has taken on women who have been through an abortion, and of women who have found themselves in an unexpected pregnancy, facing very specific circumstances that would make them wonder if an abortion was the best answer. It’s not.

Legalizing and choosing an abortion only complicates already difficult circumstances. When someone is facing an unplanned or difficult pregnancy they need love, encouragement, help, and a community of support. They do not need to feel like they are alone or at the hands of medical providers giving them only one option that, unbeknownst to them at the time, will have a lasting and traumatizing impact on their life.

Additionally, if we are horrified by the thought of anyone abusing a child in any way or killing children in their schools, in their homes, and in their neighborhoods, we should be just as horrified at the idea of a child being ruthlessly mutilated and torn from the place that should be the safest place in the world for a child; the womb of his or her mother.

As a society we should put more effort into helping and supporting and encouraging the women and children who find themselves in difficult circumstances so they know they can bring a life into the world safely and with support, rather than exploiting them at one of the most vulnerable moments in their life.

3. It Will Violate Parental Rights.

God gives children parents to help guide them on the path of life. That is the ideal. That is the rightly ordered concept of a family. That is not always the case, which is why we have to be very careful with laws and amendments that could allow adults to exploit vulnerable youth. Creating the legal framework for children to make life-altering decisions without the help of the adults in their life who care about them is like swinging the door wide open for our children to be used and abused and to be medically, socially, and culturally experimented on.

Any change to a constitution or law that strips parents of their rights to appropriately guide their minor children is an assault on the entire family.

Recently, one of my children had to undergo a wisdom tooth surgery. My teenager, a minor, was not allowed back into the consultation room until the staff knew an adult was present to hear every detail, ask questions, and either give or not give consent. Why? Because it is important that children, and even teenagers, have the right to have someone who is there advocating for them so they are not alone being advocated against. Isn’t reproductive health just as important, and even more important than the status of one’s wisdom teeth?

Our reproductive rights are a sacred space. Our ability to reproduce is a participation in God’s creative action. The importance of expressing our God-given masculinity or femininity is something the world needs and not something the world has the right to confuse, take away, exploit, mutilate, or abuse. As parents we should be deeply concerned about how far the medical community, our society, and the world as a whole, will encroach on our children’s reproductive health and their beauty and dignity as men and women created in the image and likeness of God. Make no mistake about it: our children and our teenagers will become even bigger targets for medical, political, and social agendas and experiments if we as parents are legally pushed out of the picture.

4. It Will Toss Accountability and Human Rights into the Trash.

Imagine going to the doctor and something goes wrong. You have the right to hold that doctor accountable if he or she messes up. And that’s how it should be. Now imagine a world where, not only can someone other than a qualified doctor go into a woman’s womb and take out a Baby and kill it, if that person makes a mistake and the mother experiences complications or even death, whoever performed the abortion will not be held accountable.

This is about money. And math. And exploitation. The abortion industry is a money-making machine. Every abortion is money. Every piece of fetal tissue sold is money. Every bit of the process is not about protecting women and children, it is about profiting from their vulnerability. If more people can perform abortions that means more money for more people. It is that simple. If there is no accountability, then who is to stop a person from performing abortions like it is a dirty factory? No accountability; run them through as fast as you can. No concern for the mother and certainly not for the child. If many doctors today earn commissions on the number of patients they can squeeze into a day (yes, that is true) and how many ways they can add on a test here or a lab there to up-sale when you are seeking medical help (also true), don't you think it is the same in the Abortion Industry? Of course the Abortion Industry wants a free pass to as many wombs as possible; lately, with laws prohibiting abortion, the profit margins must be shrinking.

Frankly, as a woman, I find this part insulting and disgusting. Women, we are smarter than this. Why should we let the State of Missouri or any government entity turn our bodies into another money-making machine without consequences? We deserve better than this, we should demand better than this; for ourselves, our daughters, and for every woman.

Almost ninety-six years ago a woman in Missouri found herself in an unplanned pregnancy. She was living in the United States, where, at the time, instead of a free-pass to abortion, she, in that unplanned, unexpected, and scary situation, was able to get the help and care she needed during her pregnancy because abortion was not an option. She ultimately gave her baby up for adoption. I thank God for this today, and everyday. Why? Because that Baby was my grandfather and I get to be alive today because she went through something really, truly, and profoundly hard to bring him into this world. I understand the magnitude and the ripples of that decision because her “yes” cast a pebble into the pond of life that continues through the generations and it will ripple with goodness and blessing into eternity. She said “yes” to her son. And by default, she said yes to many, many more children, including me.

We have to be willing to say a courageous and resounding “No!” No more. No more. No more to the things that are threatening our families so we can say “yes” to the good things God wants for us and the good He wants to bring about even and especially through difficult circumstances.

No matter what happens in November’s election and beyond, we must remember that it is our responsibility to safeguard the family, even when the society we live in will not. Even when our laws will not. Do not be afraid to be a champion of the family because your efforts will ripple into eternity.

We get to choose. What kind of society and what kind of future do we want for ourselves and for our children?


Am I a champion of the family?

What are ways that I safeguard my own soul, my spouse's soul, my children’s soul, the soul of my family, and the soul of society?

Do I know someone who has experienced an abortion and who needs support, encouragement, and love?

Have I experienced an abortion and realize that God wants to love me through that painful experience?

Do I know someone facing an unplanned pregnancy who could use my help, support, and encouragement?

Am I taking the time to talk about these issues with my children in an age-appropriate way so they learn to advocate for themselves in a world that is oftentimes advocating against them?

Am I taking time to talk to my extended family and my friends about these issues?

If I am a parent or a grandparent, do I take time to foster connections with my children and grandchildren so they know that I am a place of rest and a resource of help for them if they are facing a difficult circumstance?

Do I foster a culture of love and encouragement within my family?

Am I personally open to life in my marriage?

If my child came to me facing an unplanned pregnancy, would I know how to respond with love, gentleness, and with a spirit of hope for the future in order to help my child choose life?

Do I recognize that abortion is the killing of an innocent child, while also understanding that it is my responsibility to foster ways for women to feel nurtured, cared for, and supported so they can choose life and not feel shamed?

Do I help foster a culture that helps women know that if they themselves cannot care for a baby at birth, there are resources and people out there who will step in and help or even adopt a child?

Do I help women realize that they are not a failure by allowing their child to be welcomed into another home?

Do I realize that I have a civic and moral responsibility to vote on issues in support of and defense of the family?

Do I pray daily for the protection of my family and for all families throughout the world?